Today something happened that was heartbreaking and sweet at the time. I had gone to the school to give Kajal her medicine, it was almost lunch time. The principal called Kajal to her office as she had the day before and an incredibly sweet student walked Kajal over. I knew right away something was wrong. Kajal had tears silently streaming down her face. Her head was done, hands clasped tightly. I got down on my knees and looked her in the face and asked what was wrong. I hugged her and she held her head down against my shoulder, not saying a word. I wondered if she was afraid and confused, if being paged and walked by a student scared her. It didn't make sense though, I knew other students had walked her to the restroom and she'd been paged to the Principals office the day before for the same reason. She wouldn't take her medicine until she had some privacy, I thought perhaps that was it. But that didn't seem right either. She softly asked me about Logan... saying something in Marathi and mentioning his name. I told her that Logan was fine, he was at home waiting for her. She cried some more and I lifted her up into my arms and rocked her back and forth... soothing her best I could. I told her I loved her... how proud I was for how brave she was being. We all know my words are nothing more than soft mumbling to her in a language lost on such young ears but perhaps my tone conveyed how much I loved her.  I walked her back to her classroom and sat her in her chair. She was calmer, but still so sad. I waved goodbye and told her I'd see her soon. As I walked away it hit me... today was hot dog day. The children were all talking about how they couldn't wait to eat their hot dogs. Kajal doesn't know what a hot dog is. She knows the word dog, and she knows the word Logan and perhaps, just perhaps she knows what the word eat means. Perhaps I'm wrong, but my instincts screamed that Kajal was indeed afraid for Logan and afraid that the children were being made to eat.. dogs.

My heart just about broke as I ran back through the school and told the Principal what I had realized. She gave me permission to join Kajal for lunch and explain that her hot dog, wasn't in fact a dog. By the time I reached Kajal she was already sitting at her table, dog in front of her... looking so serious and sad. I pulled out her backpack that I had grabbed from her classroom and pulled out some rice, crackers and a sandwich. 'Oh my sweet girl, here is some yummy food for you (she knows the word yummy) and I pointed to the hot dog and said... 'this is not a dog, like logan, it's really beef chicken' 'beef chicken' is the word I used to introduce her to beef, considering she knows chicken as she loves the chicken strips her friend Manisha introduced her to and I really needed to get her to eat some read meat to bring her iron up. I kept saying 'beef chicken' but I could tell the words fell on deaf ears. Nothing I could say could change the fact that the children had already told her they were eating 'dogs'. She grabbed the hot dog roll and took a small nibble from that, leaving the dog itself untouched.

Some day, she'll know enough English for us to talk about many things. Her memories of her orphanage and the life she had in India prior to coming to America with me. Her feelings in our first days, her frustrations and fears will be vocalized. Perhaps then, on those days when she can finally express herself fully... I will remember to tell her, that a dog is not always a dog.